"...the most important relationship to have is with yourself...because no matter what happens you will always be with yourself."

-Diane Von Furstenberg

Saturday, July 3, 2010

it will be a great show.

Undetermined

Left, right, left, jump
Jump to get the ball
The ball that will hit the ground
Hit the ground with such force it with groan in pain
Groan in pain like the girl who just missed the dig
The dig that could have saved her that point
The point causing all the frustration
The frustration I feel probably more than her
More because I’m undetermined
Undetermined about if I want to play in college
Play for the colleges that pursue me
Perusing me while I sit and watch
Sit and watch my one track life style
One track life style that just keeps going no matter if my hearts in it or not
Not because I don’t love the sport
The sport I am in love with
A love so deep that I keep going even when my body mind and heart tell me to stop
Stop the frustration it causes me
Me, frustrated, just like the other girl
The girl who missed the dig
The dig that lost the game
The game when I scored the winning point
The winning point that doesn’t feel deserved
Deserved by the people who have more heart than me
More heart, dedication, yet they lack the skill to get there
Getting there is the problem
The problem is solved by a simple solution
The solution is genes, good ones
The good ones that make you tall
When you’re tall no one thinks twice about it
It being the dedication and weather you actually want to go on in this one track life style
The one track life style I lead
I lead it without fail
Failure in hiding it
Hiding it from the people who got me here
Here where I stand alone
Alone because everyone around me wants it more
More than anything
Anything and everything could get them there
There like across the net from me
Me who hit the ball with such force that the floor groaned

  • this is how i feel about volleyball...almost constantly. i wrote it for english, the dreaded poetry packet we are forced to do every year that i try with all my might to get out of because i honestly cant stand writing it. i love to read it but writing not so much. i always try to convey the whole meaning of this poem to my mom, but she doesnt get it. now my only inspiration to keep playing is to pay for college. great. i guess it doesnt matter anymore what i think or feel. oh and dont worry cause its not my life either im just forced to live it while doing the things others want me to.


welcome to the puppet show.

uncontrollably yours,
Jack

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