"...the most important relationship to have is with yourself...because no matter what happens you will always be with yourself."

-Diane Von Furstenberg

Thursday, July 15, 2010

so...just kidding

i like that i even thought for a second that i would be able to keep him out of this...wow obviously im insane. and of course your thinking oh my gosh get over it jaclyn so he broke up with you move on its not that big of a deal. well if you think that then *bad word* you! it was more than that. today i was on facebook and one of his friends who i met and really liked had a birthday today and so i went to see if he wrote on her wall, he didnt, but guess who did....his ex before me. the one who called me an ogre. sweet isnt she. well i clicked on her profile just because im not really a big fan of hers, wanna guess why? well anyways, i clicked it and guess whose in her profile picture besides her...standing next to her...very close...well obviously you have no clue so im gonna tell you. it was him. i honestly almost started crying. tears came to my eyes. i wanted to text him and be like wow i like the picture but i didnt want to start something so i finally gave in and said are you talking to her again? response...who? reply...carla. response...no we are just friends. reply...okay. end of conversation. but it still made me sad to see her with him standing so close and well together-ish. the one thing that makes me have that little feeling of HA take that is he had no pictures before we started dating and now the only pictures he has is of me and him together at prom...HA HA!!! take that. i do want to know though does he miss me? does he think about me atleast half as much as i do him? does he want to text me? does he still want to be friends? and is there a reason i havent gotten my stuff back yet? like you want to keep it because its mine and you cant let go? if only that was true. i really want to know the answers to the questions. so i mean if your reading this let me know it would make me feel better. and thats another question, does he still read this? he said he had been the last time i saw him but that was before he told me it was really over. did i mention i wanted to cry.

well my mother is sick. she has a virus. its a childrens virus called the hand foot and mouth virus. she has it in her mouth right now and she has been in so much pain. the medicine the doctor gave her isnt doing anything and i dont know what to do. i mean its a virus you have to let it run its course but she has been waking up in the middle of the night crying because it hurts so bad. hearing about my mom crying especially when she is in pain makes me get a sick feeling in my stomach and all over i feel weak. i hope she gets better soon its only suppose to last a week and it started sunday. were suppose to go help my sister and her husband move into their new house....again. its like their 4th house and they just had their one year aniversary in may...yeah i know. i miss her i havent seen her in a long time and i havent seen chris either. GAH! i need to work on my english!! i was suppose to work on it tonight but like i knew i would i didnt. atleast i know what im doing all day tomorrow...yay.

ill fight for you.

too many things to just pick one-ly yours,

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